All the real words are taken

8:45 – Get up, sitting, breakfast.

Today is much more fragmented than previously, as I mostly need to respond to what clients are asking me to do, and they in turn are mostly dragging their feet getting back to me. A lot of emails to write in the morning and at lunchtime though. Haruko goes out at 13:20. Soon after I make and eat lunch.

I buy my mother’s birthday present from Amazon. Curious thing, they’ve gone out of their way – with One Click buying and so forth – to make the process easy, but when it comes down to it, I have to sign in several times, re-enter my debit card information twice and page through endless unwanted information and it’s no quicker than a less fancy site would be. It would be instructive to work out why this is, how it’s got to this point, where functionality is sacrificed for features.

Haruko comes back.

I get embroiled in an attempt to find a name for a website about angels. All the real words are taken, and I have to make some new words up.

With a bit of fiddling in the LilyPond => Illustrator process the music is set and sent winging to the designer, who will pick it up on Monday; and the font I’ve been working on is settled until I return from Argentina.


Haruko makes a big Japanese meal, then sitting the sofa, then guitar work and a toast to the AAD and the future, followed by a discussion of burning issues.

Very late now, and soon to bed.

either free or very inexpensive

8:30 – Get up, sitting. No dream today. Breakfast.

More website details, more music setting. More and more of the software I use is either free or very inexpensive. A quiet revolution is happening there.

The buzzer rings – it’s the postman, with a package for me (herbal remedy) and the fourth mix of the CA stuff.

Haruko goes out and I carry on working and have my daily Donald Fagen dose and listen to Another Day on Earth again, and the CA mixes, which I think are almost there.

I go to the corner shop to buy bread for my lunch. Listening to people’s tones of voice. I derive a lot of information (perhaps erroneously) about where they are in themselves from their tone of voice, more even than the words they use.

More things get ticked off the to do list.

Haruko returns. Now I’ve moved on to a CD of mixes of CA stuff recorded in the early 80s. Surprisingly listenable, though I’m put off by my lamentable sense of time.

18:20 – I walk up to the building society on the Strand to pay in the cheque I was given yesterday. There’s a man with an electric violin busking on VIlliers Street. I wonder if people give him less money because he can obviously afford a fancy electric violin. Very good, though, in a Jean-Luc Ponty sort of way. On the way back there’s a woman playing jazz sax on the Jubilee Bridge, also very good. In the underpass there’s a young man who’s often there, kneeling, holding a begging bowl in front of him, seemingly meditating (although he allowed himself to be distracted today, I noticed). It must be excruciating. I wonder why he’s there (specifically, and doing specifically that), but don’t feel that I can ask. I ought at least to put something in his bowl.

I go to the gym and run etc for a while.

9:45 – Back in the flat. Shower. Internet. Talk to H. Write this.

00:24 – Posting. Soon to bed.

a palpable movement towards… somewhere or other

8:45 – Get up. I had a good dream, and I didn’t want to lose it. My dream was from about 1973, was directed by Fellini and featured Peter Wyngarde. I was mildly disappointed to realise it wasn’t a real Fellini film as I’d quite like to watch it again. Not only was I not in the dream, neither was anybody else I know. But Jason King in a mask, oh yes.

Sitting and breakfast.

Website tweakery.

A package containing a small Walker job that needs to be done before Lunlunta arrives in the post.

At 12:30 I begin to make lunch – stir-fry rice with prawns and peas and some spices. I’m beginning to enjoy spices.

After lunch Denise comes over to brief me on various websites and pay me for some of the work I’ve done. She then leaves for another appointment and I work through the corrections. Minor difficulties with a font job I”ve been doing recently, talking my sister through installing fonts on the Mac (and converting a font for her so that she can install it) and then beginning the music setting.

Also uploading a job to the Walker server.

I run into a tricky bit in the music setting (merging a melody and chord part into a single stave), and am about to give up and go to the gym when I get it to work, so I decide to stay home, have some dinner (courtesy of H – ginger pork, mmm!) and carry one working on the job after dinner.

I complete the first draft at just after 23:00 and email it across to the editor in charge.

All go, then.

00:19 – a couple of mails to write and then bed. Who’ll be directing my dreams tonight?

Yesterday I was stuck in the body, today I was relieved and mildly exhilerated to do things and get things done. Completed tasks, even very small ones, are like steps forward – I can look at a ticked-off entry on a to-do list and it’s a palpable movement towards… somewhere or other.

tonight-me and last-night-me

Haruko wakes me up at 10:00 – I had a terrible bout of insomnia last night and didn’t get to sleep until after four, maybe closer to five. I’m not feeling too powerful… also a twinge in my foot, which only come quite rarely these days. Sitting, breakfast.

I do more work on the websites during the day, with some purchase of bits and pieces on the internet. Also a call from Walker about a quick bit of music setting, which I should be able to fit in, hopefully….

Haruko goes out and comes back with what looks like a terrific book on design. I mooch. I’m trapped in the body today, and I don’t feel I have the strength to fight, so I let the body have its way.

More website work. Call from Denise with directions.

H cooks Japanese food for dinner. Hurrah!

More website work. In retrospect it takes a lot longer than I thought. It’s very instructive to compare my state of mind now with my state of mind last night. I’m very conscious of tonight-me and last-night-me being quite different people. I’m also conscious that the area of difference is one for which there are no adequate words – not that it’s deep, but verbal description slides around it and can’t get a grip.

23:29 – To bed soon, and to sleep soon after I hope.

entirely in five pence pieces

8:45 – Get up. Sitting, breakfast.

Most of the day I’m working on websites and answering occasional emails. In the morning I do a bit of shelf-rearrangement and vacuuming also.

Haruko goes out.

I go out and buy a small loaf of bread for lunch, and pay for it entirely in five pence pieces.

Back to the website.

Haruko comes back. British financial institutions are cruel.

More work.

Dinner is steak a la Haru (yesterday there was a lot of meat in the end-of-sell-by-date section of the supermarket – most of it went into the freezer).

And more web programming.

Today I listen to a lot more CDs – the Fagen again, the latest mix of the last CA session, Eno’s last album (Bone Bomb is one of the most extraordinary things ever) and a couple of compilations I made and never sent, one of music I listened to while I was at school, another of music I listened to while I was at college.

The site is done, mostly, or at least my part of it. Now all we need is content.

I get kGTD, an add-on for OmniOutliner, which several websites have been suggesting will help me organise myself.

Late to bed again tonight. Oh, well.

I have no idea what I’m doing, but it smells nice.

8:00 – Despite the fact that I didn’t set the alarm, I wake up on the dot. Actually the clock says 7:00, but it doesn’t fool me.

Stumble out of bed and set out breakfast. Soon H joins me and we sit, then we have breakfast.

Coding challenge.

9:45 – I go to the Supermarket with my Father. Outside there are roadworks on our side of the road.

I load up with discounted stuff for the freezer.

Back at the flat I interrupt the vacuuming session. I unpack the shopping and put some of it away. H then puts the rest of it away.

I have a hot shower and a shave.

Back to the coding challenge. I’ve designed something so that if I want it to do something very simple, I have to write all sorts of workarounds. Much easier to write it again from scratch. It’s much better this way.

I make lunch – very spicy chicken something. I mix the spices myself in the pestle and mortar. I have no idea what I’m doing, but it smells nice. I should do it more often.

14:45 – Lunch finally served.

Listening to Morph the Cat again, and more websiting.

The buzzer begins to ring frenetically. I tell the person doing it not to bother, as I won’t let him in. It turns out to be someone for upstairs, so I do let him in and inform him that I won’t be doing it again, so that he knows. I suggest that the next time he goes out, perhaps he should borrow a key.

Websiting and Photoshopping.

20:00 – Dinner by H.

21:15 – Guitar work.

More Photoshopping. Quite late in life I’m discovering the pleasure of Javascript roll-overs. Really good ones evoke the Eeyore response in me (when given a burst balloon and an empty honey pot for his birthday, Eeyore derives a tremendous amount of pleasure from putting the balloon in the pot, taking it out again and repeating this process).

23:35 BST – Post this. At some point soon to bed, I expect.

A very attached day.

5:00 – I wake up. I don’t know why. It takes me a while to get back to sleep.

7:15 – Rise, sitting.

8:15 – Breakfast. I feel very tired to day, and emotionally deflated.

I have three websites to make from scratch in a bit of a hurry. In the morning I mostly work on one of them and in the afternoon mostly on the other. I listen to the Donald Fagen CD again (how my life has changed – only a couple of years ago I wouldn’t have referred to playing a specific CD because I listened to a constant stream of music. Now, apart from times I’m working on colouring in or something, I choose something I want to listen to, listen to it, then put it away and don’t have anything playing. Three years ago, the lack of audio stimulation would have driven me slightly mad).


For an hour before lunch I listen to a hypnotherapy recording, not really because I need whatever it is that the recording is offering, but because I’m curious as to what it sounds like. It can’t compete with the gathering headache, anyway.

I go outside to get something for lunch. Cold and damp, but a cold, damp spring day. The flavour in the air is definitely not that of winter any more.

After lunch I work on the other web site, which is more involved. I’m attempting to work with too many applications open (I’m down to 500 meg of RAM now), which really slows me down, especially Lightroom, which I need to use to get the RAW pictures from the camera. The quality of the RAW pictures is marvellous, though.

While I’m in the other room scanning something, I get a call from my sister, to whom the Powerbook with a gig of RAM went. The engineer is installing her wireless and can I remember the admin password… The one I tell her is wrong. But… it can’t be. I’m confused.

Some practising.

More website stuff.

Ugh. Slow, frustrating day. A very attached day.

DInner by H – more Japanese food. My chopstick control is severely sub-par today.

After dinner, I carry on with the site – it comes together into something, but I’m not sure what. I like the one I did this morning, though.

23:28 – Post this. Definite lie-in tomorrow.

dust and stuff

7:05 – Rise, shower.

7:30 – Sitting.

8:15 – Breakfast.

At 9:30 I go out and wait for a 171 to Brockley, where I’ll be working with Denise today. It takes a while to arrive, and then it takes a while to get there, so I get a lot of reading done, which reminds me of when I was a peripatetic freelance, and I could get through a book a week, at least. It took me six months to read Gravity’s Rainbow, but I managed it.

I arrive at Denise and Terry’s just before eleven. Their house is currently being revibrated in the extreme – builders have been in and left, and currently they’re doing the decorations with pro-decorator Andy. There’s dust and stuff everywhere. After a cup of tea we retire to the office, where we work with the physio website and discuss some sites that Denise needs to be made until lunch, then we have lunch, then I take photos of her icon paintings for the relevant site. A couple of robins hang around to get photographed, too. Then more photos indoors.

Andy gives me a lift back and I get home at about 18:00

19:00 – Dinner – Japanese food. Mmm!

In the evening I realise I need to have something on the tv, and as the tv companies aren’t providing anything particularly inspiring, it’s down to a DVD. I put on Slaughterhouse 5, which I’ve not seen before, although I read the book a long long time ago. Interesting casting. Perhaps too faithful – in order to capture Vonnegut’s combination of satire, philosophy and autobiography it would be necessary to do something less straightforward. Still, enjoyable. Oh, and we eat popcorn.

23:26 – Write this – soon to bed.

the only way I do dancey these days

7:05 – Rise, get dressed.

7:20 – Sitting.

8:00 – Breakfast.


Haruko goes out. I listen to the new Donald Fagen album. Then I practise.

More Stuff.

Haruko returns.

Having dithered over lunch I go and get a tin of tuna fish, some bread and some cream crackers. I have tuna fish sandwiches. The cream crackers are reserved for later.

Reading tutorials on bits of code I’d like to try out.

I practise the Bach Invention IV, then make dinner.

It was supposed to be soup, but it didn’t turn out liquid enough for soup. I thought it was nice, but to solid for soup.

After dinner, we play guitar.

Then I put Morph the Cat on again. The title track is quite dancey in as relaxed sort of way, which is the only way I do dancey these days.

Writing and posting this. Soon to bed.

much as a 12-year-old would

7:45 – I get up and shower. I also sit, but this is interrupted by several telephone calls. H gets up and we have breakfast, and I work on the AAD site.

The morning and afternoon are composed of several strands of work mingled together. This makes it difficult to assess where they begin and end.

Lunch is a fry-up. Hooray for that, then. I go out and get bread. I always run back from the shops, much as a 12-year-old would. This is probably undignified in someone my age. This is because I usually go to the corner shop, which means I walk past the other convenience store on our road, because if I’m getting bread, the corner shop has a better choice, but I run past the other shop so that I’m not spotted… I’ve always been afraid of people in shops. In fact it’s a lot better than it used to be. But I still find myself running back from the shops, without really intending to.

Ben has sent another CD of mixes with tweaks of the CA material. This one is much stronger – in fact a couple of tracks are nearly there, which is gratifying, and at least one irritatingly close to “there” – a bit like the way the note B is nearly C – more frustrating than when it was way off.

The afternoon’s mingled tasks are more complicated – at one point I’m fielding much the same remark – “It’s not working! Why isn’t it working?” from two different sources, without really being able to answer either of them, but by the end of the afternoon they stop asking and I know a lot more than previously about PostScript errors and BitTorrent.

I also – in between these cries for help – work on sound files.

At 19:15 I go to the Movements class. The last one for this term. I appear to have learned something. After the class I pick up three flyers, one of which gives the numbers one to twelve in Russian, which will make counting fun.

Tube back home, cheese sandwich, catch up on the web, write this, soon to bed.